A community for Ace/Aro people to share stories, talk about problems, support each other and have fun!
Spectrum?
Hey everyone! I'm new here--I'm not ace/acro, but I'm an ally, here to learn and support. I've heard a lot of people use the term "spectrum" to describe sexuality...do you think this applies to the asexual community as well? Like, can you be more or less asexual than someone else? I'm sorry if this sounds like kind of a silly question, and I don't mean to offend anyone. I'm just still learning, and would love to hear everyone's thoughts.




Hi!
I defintitely think that its a spectrum. Some people are sex-repulsed, while others are sex-positive and are okay with having sexual relations. There are also a lot of different sexualities that sort of fall underneath the ace spectrum - the one I know the most about is demisexual, meaning that a person doesn't feel sexual attraction until after a really strong emotional bond is formed. Perhaps others in the community know about the other terms underneath asexuality?
Thanks! This is helpful!
I think that it is just like the color spectrum. There are many different combinations like a lunch menu. The food and drink you choose is only one of the many combinations that you could possibly choose. It just comes down to who you are.
There is definitely some kind of spectrum. Basically this is because of the Demi-sexual and Gray-(a)Sexual portions of the Asexual Community. In both cases, the person likes a person as a friend until a stronger bond is felt by the ace-spectrum person between them and the other. During this time they might "date" so they can get to know one another better emotionally. Usually these people are okay with eventually having sex with the person they feel most bonded with.
Other portions are completely against even discussing the idea of sex with a partner of any kind.
The aro spectrum is the part I personally don't know about. However, I do know that some are okay to have a romantic relationship if their partner needs that part of the relationship along with the sexual side of it.
There are many portions of the spectrum that I don't know much about and others that identify as those may be able to tell you more. Hope this helped a little bit!
Definitely! Thanks!
I identify as gray asexual. For me, gray asexuality means that I experience sexual attraction but have a low sex drive and/or I sometimes have sexual attraction but not strongly enough to act on it. I am also panromantic, but gray asexual people can be aromantic as well.
I don't need an emotional bond to experience sexual attraction or to have a sex drive, but demi-sexual people do, as far as I understand what demisexuality is. So I believe there is a distinct difference between demi-sexual and gray asexual.
Absolutely right! I'm both gray-ace (low sex drive / attraction usually not strong enough to want to act on) and demi (the former only occurs with an emotional bond) so yes they're definitely different things, and you can be both! :)
Hi there! I was reading this thread with fascination because I consider myself demisexual, but most people I know in person don't know that. It's never really been an issue for me, luckily, but it has put me at odds because I don't know if I'm...enough of a demisexual, I guess, to call myself that?
But what you're describing sounds a lot like me! Low sex drive and not a strong enough attraction to act on it. I don't really have anything to contribute, but thank you for sharing because it helps me understand myself just a little bit more. <3