Late one Saturday evening, I was awakened by the ringing of my phone. In a sleepy grumpy voice I said hello. The party on the other end of the line paused for a moment before rushing breathlessly into a lengthy speech. "Mom, this is Susan and I'm sorry I ... I have an old pair of shoes by the back door to slip on when I want to step outside to check the grill or gather wood. They do fine, but the tongues keep slipping down and getting in the way. I finally decided to cut them out when my wife asked: What ar... A book was published about recoving from depression and suicide. The book was titled "There is Always Hope". But after the books were shipped, the publisher noticed a typo on the cover and the title now read "There is Always Rope". A man driving his car down a country road was forced to stop before a giant puddle blocking the entire way. Looking to the side of the road, the man noticed a goober leaning on a fence. "Think it's safe to cross?" the man asked. "I reckon so," replied the...2 participating ...a mugger wearing a mask stopped a well-dressed man and stuck a gun in his ribs. "Give me your money," he demanded. Scandalized, the man replied, "You can’t do this – I’m a US Congressman!" "Oh! In that case," smiled the robber, "Give me MY money!" ...except for those things that just don't add up. I have CDO. It's like OCD but all the letters are in alphabetical order ... as they should be. Three friends from the local congregation were asked, 'When you're in your casket and friends and congregation members are mourning over you, what would you like them to say?' Artie said: ' I would like them to say I was a wonderful husband, a fine spirit... ...showed that out of 2,293,618,367 people, 94% are too lazy to actually read that number.