"Clowns divorce. Custardy battle" - Simon Munnery
Oly and Sven
Oly and Sven (two Norwegian bachelor farmers) decided to go fishing in the Great North Woods. They packed all their tackle and a cooler full of beer, and drove to their favorite lakeside baitshop. After renting a boat, they started rowing around the lake, fishing and enjoying their beverages.
Upon reaching one shady cove, they started catching fish like crazy. As soon as they dropped a lure in the water they'd get a strike. After an hour of this, Sven sees Oly reach into his tacklebox and pull out a piece of chalk. He leans over the side of the boat and marks a chalk "X" on the side.
Curious, Sven asks "Hey Oly, why are ya putting an X on the boat?"
Oly looks at him slyly. "Well, this is a damn good fishing spot. I want to make sure we can find it next time."
Sven snorts. "Oly, yer a damn fool. We might not get the same boat next time!"




Oly was sitting in a bar one day when Sven came in with a big ol' grin on his face. He sits down next to Sven and orders a drink.
"Hey, Sven! Why are you so happy?"
"Oh, Oly... I had QUITE the date with Leena last night."
"Do tell, Sven!"
Sven takes a long sip of his drink and then begins his story.
"You see, Leena picked me up in her new truck and we drove out into the woods. Beautiful night, ya know. She takes us down this dirt road and then stops in the middle 'a nowhere and gets out of da truck."
Oly gives Sven a confused look, not sure where this is going.
"She walks in front of the truck and, in the light of the truck lights, takes off all of her clothes and yells, 'Take what you will, Sven!''
Sven takes another sip.
"So, I took the truck and left."
Oly nods.
"That's mighty smart of you, Sven. Those clothes would've never fit you!"