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Offbeat Home & Life

Offbeat Home & Life

We celebrate non-traditional folks and help you create a comfortable space for yourself that feels like home.

270 members
Posted bylackstoastin/offbeathome-Feb 28, 2016 at 2:34 PMΔ

Analyzing the costs and benefits of having a kid: is it worth it?

  • Parenting

Analyzing the costs and benefits of having a kid: is it worth it? | Offbeat Home & Life

I just have to quickly reply, I'm a UK gal, but lurk around OBM to try and help me think through everything you've just wrote. Thank you from me, for being honest and saying something people may frown upon i.e. thinking about kids in such a careful way, because you don't want to neglect anybody present or future.

offbeathome.com
Comments3
  • HesDeadJimApr 03, 2016 at 10:58 AMΔ

    Thoughts from anyone? This is particularly on my mind, as I just had to end a budding romance with someone after the revealed to me (on the third date!) that they were planning on having a child with their best friend this year. Responses have been VERY polarizing, the lines being drawn pretty clearly between "friends who have had kids" and "friends who do NOT have kids". Basically, anyone who has kids that I know told me to run in the opposite direction as fast as I can. It makes me wonder if having children is so draining that it becomes a situation one would not recommend once they are actually in it. Thanks for posting this, OP!

    • KjerendipityApr 05, 2016 at 3:43 PMΔ

      I wonder if they're warning you off the idea of kids in general or if they're warning you off the idea of being with someone who's going to have a child with their best friend. There's nothing wrong with starting a family that way, but it's unusual enough that I can see it unsettling some people.

  • anonymous_EczK9TGxEPApr 05, 2016 at 3:41 PMΔ

    I really love this. Or maybe I just love that it's actually asking the question. As an intensely kid-ambivalent person, this kind of discussion is SO helpful to me.

    It's such a challenging decision, with so many unknowns. If my child will be healthy, intelligent, mentally stable, and adorable, then of course I want kids! Sign me up! But if my child will have a major illness (mental or physical)... I'm not equipped to deal with that. And I feel like if I can't give an enthusiastic "YES!" to the idea of being a parent, no matter the child's circumstances, then I shouldn't be a parent.

Offbeat Home & Life

Offbeat Home & Life

We celebrate non-traditional folks and help you create a comfortable space for yourself that feels like home.

270 members
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