The Edge of Dystopia - What do we do now?!

The Edge of Dystopia - What do we do now?!

Yesterday, I randomly downloaded an ebook from my library list. As it turns out, it's a dystopian novel set in Portland during a killing, prolonged west coast drought. Now, I have always liked good dystopian fantasy. It serves as escape while being thought-provoking in that hyperbolic cautionary-tale sort of way, but there is new a influence operating here.

Putting aside the unfortunate choices by the author during construction of this dystopian landscape (Among other things, a moose in Portland? Really? That damned thing better have escaped from the zoo.) our current socio-political climate and the denial of climate change make the possibility of a scenario like this somewhere in the US far more likely than when the book was conceived. I find it impossible to suspend disbelief and read it as the fantasy it is supposed to be. Instead it fuels what seem to be very real fears about what might happen next in our very real and inescapable world.

I see people going about their daily business, as I am, performing the mundane tasks that lay the groundwork for making tomorrow livable, but I've lost the sense that I influence the outcome of anything. What I thought was reality has been compromised. The fantasy story in which the obvious villain obtains power because the our friends and neighbors hand it to them is real. It happened. What do I do now?

That was the question in my mind Tuesday night as my tired brain tried to process the news of Trumps election win. What do I do now? The question is still there two days later, largely unanswered, rattling against my inner ear, making me slightly queasy (or maybe that's the unexpected tilt of the landscape). What am I going to do now?

The answers will have to be simple for now. I'll continue going to work, loving my family, supporting my friends and generally trying to be a good person. Keeping in mind that all I've ever thought I could influence was my immediate environment, I'll try to be more present in it. I'll explore this new landscape with the knowledge that for us, it might not be as sound or as long-lasting as we thought it was.

My personal priorities are shifting, but I'll hold tight to the values that determine my makeup. Those have not changed. I am still the woman who believes strongly in honesty, individuality, human rights and freedom of self-expression. I am still me at my core and although it took me a few moments in this new reality to recognize that truth, the knowledge gives me strength to move forward. I am preparing myself to more openly express and act on my values and that for now will be enough. The warrior in me is awake, waiting.

Oh, and I'll be much more careful what I download from the library. Perhaps I'll reread Dhalgren. Delany's dystopia is still a distant dream, right? Right?

"to wound the autumnal city.
    So howled out for the world to give him a name.
The in-dark answered with wind."